Women in Gaza: “The worst time is when I have my period”

“Sometimes it feels like our entire day revolves around finding food and water, using the toilet, and trying to wash ourselves. Since the war escalated, we have had to flee numerous times.

We were displaced from Gaza City to Rafah, and after Rafah was attacked, we had to flee to Khan Younis. We live in a tent in the desert, where the temperatures are now reaching well above 40 degrees [100°F]. It is really unbearable. I have been sick for months. Sick from the bad food and dirty water; sick from all the dust in the air.

Taking care of personal hygiene is a massive issue for us. Toothbrushes, toothpaste, sanitary napkins, shampoo – everything that used to be available and affordable is now almost impossible to get.

How shall we afford toothpaste if we don’t even have money to buy food?

It is especially hard for me when I have my period. We share a bathroom with three families. I only have minutes to use the toilet, because there will always be others in front of the door waiting. I have to be quick; I cannot take the time I need.

I always take my personal items with me to the bathroom in a plastic bag, and I also have my own bin bag because otherwise I am too embarrassed.

We also hardly get any toilet paper, as it is way too expensive and often not available. When I have my period, I wish I was able to properly clean myself.

I have heard from others that they are using old clothes and towels instead of sanitary napkins. I am lucky that my parents are really going out of their way to find sanitary napkins for me to make my life as a young woman a little bit more bearable.

One time, we received humanitarian assistance, and they also distributed hygiene and sanitary napkins. That was so helpful, however these past weeks no aid has reached us at all.

We do not have enough water to wash ourselves properly. Especially now, with the heat and the dust, I wish we could wash ourselves every day.

Now, with all the difficulties we are facing in getting water, we only bathe ourselves once per week, sometimes only once per month. We walk around twenty minutes to the next water well. We usually wait half an hour to fill our buckets, and then we need another half an hour to get back home. I am always afraid when I have to go and get water. There are so many people and always bombardments going on. Large gatherings of people are often being targeted. I try to finish filling the water as quickly as possible and go directly back to our tent.

I really hope the war will end soon so I can go back to school. We used to go camping with my family. I would have never imagined having to permanently live in a tent in the middle of the desert.

I think the situation is especially difficult for women and girls. We are the ones who are often staying in our tents, while the men go out and try to work or find food. Our lives and prospects have been reduced to just trying to stay alive in our tents. Since I was ten years old, I dreamt of becoming a doctor or a nurse. The longer this war continues, the more impossible it feels that I can ever accomplish my goals.”

Sawsan, 30: “My baby has a skin rash because we cannot afford to change her diapers as often as we should.”

“These past months have been an absolute nightmare. We had to leave our home in northern Gaza just a few days after the war started. We have been living in very bad conditions, which affected our physical health, our mental health, and our financial situation. My husband lost his parents and all his siblings after their house was bombed. No one survived. Our three children and I are the only family he now has left.

We struggle to feed our children; we do not have enough water. As a woman, as a mother, I always struggle with the lack of privacy. We live in a tent, and everyone can always see and hear everything. We share a bathroom with lots of other people. There is no hygiene, no clean space. When I want to use the bathroom, I always bring my little personal bag. These past months, I’ve lacked sanitary napkins, we don’t have enough clothes, and not enough water to wash ourselves or our underwear. All of this is very basic hygiene, but despite its importance it’s just impossible to maintain.

I used to bathe my children almost every day. Now, there is not enough water, and I can often only wash them once per week. This is really hard, because we live in the middle of the desert, and everything is full of dust in our tent. Once I wash my children, I use the same water to wash our clothes.

When I have my period, I use the same hygiene pad for the entire day. Any woman will understand what this means, and how uncomfortable this is. When I need to use the bathroom, I often must wait for a long time.

Usually, my husband goes and gets water for all of us. He often has to wait for hours. When he is not around or is trying to find food for us, I go with the children.

I gave birth to my youngest child in January. It was very stressful giving birth among all the destruction and ongoing bombardment. I still remember the smell of phosphor and the sound of the airstrikes.

I had a C-section, and it took me many weeks to get back on my feet. The lack of vitamins and proteins, the lack of sufficient water and food; these are really detrimental to the health of pregnant women and young mothers.

For babies, the situation is also dire. There is no formula available in the market, so I use whatever other kinds of milk I can find. It is also hard to get diapers for my baby. She suffers from a rash because we often have to keep the diapers on longer than we should.

As a mother, every second of this war is filled with fear. I fear for my children all of the time. I am afraid that one of them could be harmed or killed.”

Eman, 35: “I cut up diapers because I had no sanitary napkins”

“I am divorced and am taking care of my two children by myself. I am the head of the household, and I have no one to support me. I loved the life we lived before the war started. I keep thinking of the memories we made, of the life we built. It is all gone now, everything we have worked for.

Now, we live in a place where there is no privacy. There is no food, no water, and the sanitation situation is very bad. Everyone around us seems to be sick all the time. I have been able to work as a drama teacher for children and earn some money, but it is not enough to feed myself and my children.

We have no proper bathroom. Together with two other families, we dug a hole into the ground and use a bucket. We have set up some tarpaulins around it to at least create some privacy. We used to clean our bathroom with detergent and water. Now, because of the way we have constructed our toilet, we cannot really properly clean it.

We can only wash ourselves once per week, because there is simply no water available. I use the same water for all three of us. Changing the sanitary napkins is also an ordeal. It is hard to change it in the small space we have, and sometimes people just open the door to our makeshift bathroom without even knocking. I often have period pain, and that is when I usually want to sit on the toilet for longer. Now, there is no toilet to sit on. It is all very uncomfortable. A few times, I did not have any sanitary napkins. I ended up cutting up a children’s diaper and using it instead.

I also really miss proper toothpaste. My teeth are very sensitive, and I used to brush my teeth with a soft toothbrush and a special toothpaste. Before the war, I used special shampoo as my skin gets irritated easily. Now, like everyone else, we are using soap bars for everything. It is especially difficult to wash your hair with normal soap, as we do not have enough water to properly get the residue our of our hair.

My children are suffering from all the dust. They want to play and go outside. I try to change their clothes when they come back into the tent, because they have trouble breathing. But we do not have enough water to always clean the clothes, and it is so hard to get all the dirt and dust off them. Both children have been sick for months. They suffer from stomach aches a lot. I took them to different clinics and health points whenever I could. It breaks my heart that I cannot keep my children safe and healthy.

I do what I can – but nothing around us is healthy, neither the food or water, nor the situation we are stuck in. As a mother, I want nothing more but provide my children with a safe place to live, with good food and clean water. I want them to continue their education and live their dreams. It makes me sad to think about the life our children and us have been reduced to, and whether this will ever change again. My wish is that the world can, even just for a few minutes, be with us, feel what we are feeling, suffer what we are suffering. Maybe then this war can finally stop.